Have you been wondering “Am I dating a narcissist?” lately? Maybe you’ve heard this phrase or term being thrown around and you’re just curious, or perhaps you have some serious concerns. Either way, in this article we’ll explore this concept so you can start decoding your partner’s behavior to see if they have narcissistic traits.
What is Narcissistic Personality Disorder
Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) is a mental health disorder characterized by an excessive sense of self-importance, a constant need for admiration, and a lack of empathy for others. Professionals use the DSM-5 to ascertain whether or not a person meets the criteria to be diagnosed with NPD.
Professionals usually look for an individual who has a pervasive pattern of grandiosity (in fantasy or behavior), a need for admiration, and a lack of empathy, beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts when diagnosing NPD.
It’s important to note that just because a person shows one or two of these characteristics, that does not make them a Narcissist. All people have narcissistic traits. However, it is when a single person meets multiple of these criteria that you should start considering that they might have a Personality Disorder.
Let’s look at 9 signs that you might be dating an individual with NPD:
They Have a Grandiose Sense of Self-importance
One sign of NPD is that they may exaggerate achievements and talents. Another aspect of this warning sign is that they expect to be recognized as superior without commensurate achievements.
They will often get very aggressive or angry if they do not get the type of recognition or respect that they believe they should get, despite not doing anything to earn that respect or recognition. This person may be seen as a know-it-all and constantly get into arguments about topics they know nothing about, or believe that they know better, even when talking to experts within a field.
They’re Preoccupied With Fantasies
If your partner seems to be on a never-ending quest to find unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love that interferes with their daily functioning or logical thinking, it can be a sign of NPD.
Having a healthy passion and drive to do better is good. However, people diagnosed with NPD take it to an unhealthy level of obsession and it hinders any enjoyment. It can take over their lives and they can drag their partners down with their unhealthy obsessions!
They look down on others
If your partner is the type that refuses to hang out with “lower caliber” or “low society” individuals, it is a red flag! People with NPD often see themselves as more significant and special than others. They have a belief that they can only be understood by, or should only associate with other special or high-status people.
Therefore, they will avoid spending time with individuals who they believe are "below them"
They Need Constant Admiration and Compliments
Does your partner get angry or depressed when you aren’t constantly giving them compliments and admiration? This is a tell-tale sign that your partner might suffer from narcissistic personality disorder.
While some people’s love language may be “Words of Affirmation” someone with NPD takes it to a whole new level. They require constant admiration and compliments (whether or not they have done something to deserve it). It can become exhausting having to constantly affirm and re-affirm a partner 24/7.
They Have An Attitude of Entitlement
Me, myself, and, I is the name of the game for someone with NPD. If your partner has unreasonable expectations of others; especially favorable treatment or automatic compliance with his or her expectations, you may be dealing with a narcissist.
Do they get angry whenever your friend group doesn’t automatically want to do what they want to do? Does your partner feel like they automatically deserve superior treatment or consideration from others? These are all red flags!
Trouble with Interpersonal Relationships
Is your partner interpersonally exploitative (i.e. - takes advantage of others to achieve their own ends)? A Narcissist tends to keep people around based on what the person can do for them as opposed to genuine connections.
So if you’ve noticed that your partner struggles to keep people around for long, it can be a red flag!
They Lack Empathy
Are they unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others? One of the characteristics of NPD is that they lack empathy towards others. If you’ve noticed that your partner makes decisions or says things with little to no consideration of how it will affect others, it can be a sign of NPD.
Envy Plays A Big Role In Their Life
If your partner has an uncanny obsession with envy it can be a sign of narcissistic personality disorder. People diagnosed with NPD are often envious of others or believe that others are envious of him or her.
Comes Across As Arrogant
Are you constantly having to make excuses for your partner’s arrogant behaviors or attitudes? This characteristic can easily come off as self-confidence or someone who has high self-esteem, which is why many people can be attracted to a narcissist initially.
However, the truth is that people with NPD have a very fragile sense of self. Therefore, they will usually display haughty behaviors, etc.
Disclaimer And A Word of Caution
Please note that this article is written purely for entertainment purposes. Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) is a medical disorder that requires a professional diagnosis. A person can only be diagnosed by a medical professional. However, this article will explore narcissistic traits in individuals. If you think you, or someone you know may be suffering from NPD please reach out to a medical professional for assistance.